— Dating brings only temptation,
guilt and sorrow! My parents knew nothing of protecting their children by teaching them
at home or of godly courtship, so I don’t hold anything against them. There just
wasn’t much said back then about courtship except in very conservative circles, I
guess.
Anyway, I grew up in an atmosphere where all the young teenagers talked about
girlfriends and boyfriends, and I’m sad to say that my early teenage diaries were
filled with words about the boys I admired, the things they said to me, and the dreams I
had of dating. I loved the attention the guys gave me, and I was boy crazy. Nobody told me
how important it was to guard my heart and mind and focus my attention on serving the Lord
until the time came for me to "release my emotions" in a godly way towards the
one man who was to be my husband someday.
I got into trouble just by being a "friend" to several guys who needed a
friend. I always felt it was the Christian thing to do to be nice to everyone and to help
the "underdog." Little did I realize how quickly a "friendship" could
turn into a romance, especially on the part of the one who really needed a friend. This
can happen too easily just in casual conversation at church or when families get together.
(In my case, it was the boy who lived several houses down.) Because of my experience, I
think it’s best to never engage in extended conversations with anyone of the opposite
sex, and especially never alone.
As I grew older I began to date, and how I regret it now! Because I was dating for fun
and popularity, I didn’t always date guys that I would even consider for a mate. I
never meant to "fall in love" or become attached to any one. I was just being a
"friend" and having a "good time." But one guy I went steady with
really fell for me, and I became really emotionally involved with him also, to my hurt. My
life became an emotional roller coaster, and I was constantly filled with anxiety and
guilt. Finally, I realized I had to break up with this guy because I really didn’t
want to marry him. Although we were so emotionally involved with each other, I always said
I only loved him "in the Lord." The devil just used this to destroy me
emotionally. Years after I finally broke up, scars were still there - emotional scars -
and anxieties. How I praise the Lord for His complete forgiveness, but I would not desire
anyone to follow the path I took.
What a blessing it must be for every young lady who is in surrender to God and her
parents to devote her "best years" to the Lord, and then, according to
God’s will and in His timing, and with her parent’s counsel and involvement,
begin a pure and godly courtship with a godly young man! "Flee also youthful
lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord
out of a pure heart." - ll. Timothy 2:22